i've come to learn that pretty much everything about me is a contradiction...besides my belief in the Lord.
but even my prayers--i will be asking the Lord for something that i am desperate about, and then end with telling Him that i know if my prayer isn't answered, it's because He has something better in mind.
(which does seem contradictory to me.)
over time, my prayers have become less about what i want/
it is the result of life experiences...
learning that life is unfair.
life is hard.
life is painful.
but God is still good and faithful through it all.
that doesn't mean i don't cry out to God.
believe me, i do.
but there's a different sort of faith and trust involved now.
because i have been through some crap...that i couldn't understand why i was at the time (and for quite some time after), but with continuously seeking God...i had epiphanies and realizations. and that "crap" has consequently formed me into who i am today.
-and i am thankful to have moved past it all and significantly grown. because those experiences have shown me how undeniably God pulls through.
the gist of this song is sending a prayer up, and then concluding with the thought...
"but maybe not, not today...
maybe You'll provide in other ways,
and if that's the case...
we'll give thanks to You, with gratitude."
- nichole nordeman...from her woven & spun album.
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